Quietness...isn't it lovely?

I should be preparing for the class I have to teach tomorrow on mediation but I'm taking advantage of having two sleeping kids and being able to vent. I apologize now for the rambling nature of this post.

Have you ever had one of those days that nothing goes right, everything that can go wrong does? That has been my day.

I have been up since 5am--Grace did this weird thing last night where she would wake up every two hours screaming inconsolably for like 10-15 minutes, then she would just all of a sudden calm down and go to sleep. Her sats were fine and heart rate was fine so I don't know what was going on.

Morgan woke up and was actually quite good, she even allowed me to fall asleep for a few minutes while I watched "Super Why" with her. But that didn't last because I was awaken to Grace's pulse ox machine--sound asleep and her sats kept dropping, so I had to keep increasing her oxygen--we went from 1/2 a liter to a little over 1 liter in 40 minutes; but as she woke up she began to over sat and I was able to bring her back down to 1/2 liter.

We met with PEEPs today--a program to help babies and toddlers with development if they have a delay. But once they left everything fell apart. Grace was already late for her 10am meds and was beginning to let me know, since one of the meds were methadone. So I went to get the methadone and there was none left in the bottle. Apparently I didn't put the cap on tight enough and all of the remaining methadone spilled out. I began to freak out, but then I called her doctor to get a prescription only to find that they don't have the proper license to fill it. It is now 12pm, Grace is freaking out and screaming and Morgan decided that it would be fun to get into my baking drawer and throw sprinkles onto the floor. The sad thing is that I let her do it because if I put Grace down she would scream and then Morgan would throw a tantrum once I stopped her, so I let her make the biggest mess she has EVER made.

Back to the methadone--I called the cardiologist office and followed the automated message and left all the information for a refill. But 2o minutes later I decided I better talk to someone to be sure--good thing I did because a mess ensued. The secretary took all the information and said someone would call me back, they did and told me that the refill needed to go through the surgeon so she gave me the number to Linda one of the nurse practitioners. She couldn't help me because the cardiothoraxic team signed off on Grace a long time ago. So she called and spoke to cardiology's nurse and then I was told to call cardiology back because no one could even find the discharge form with the methadone prescription on it. So now almost 2pm, 4 hours later I still don't have any methadone and don't know if I will have some for tonight.

I did however pry off the little inner dispensing lid on the methadone bottle and suctioned every little drop out of it, diluted what was there and gave it to Grace. I figured a little was better than none. I also gave her a dose of benedryl since it was ok to give her some when we first went off the ativan--hence why she is sound asleep.

The afternoon and evening doesn't get much better. I have one to one meetings with my RAs, a mediation to do between two residents and I still have to plan a lesson for tomorrow. In addition to taking care of the girls and trying to give Grace a bath--which takes about an hour with dressing changes and retaping the cannula. I'm really not complaining, just venting. The good thing though is that we are actively looking for an apartment so that I can quit. Our goal is to get to the first week of November, that way we can keep our 2nd insurance for another month.

For those who are still reading my rambling, I'll leave you with an update on Grace. Grace is doing good for the most part, she has grown in the last two weeks. When we came home she weighed 9lbs 15oz and was 21in long. Yesterday she weighed 10lbs 4oz and 22 in long!! She had a sedated echo on Monday and things look good--the biggest news from that is that her blood clot in her atrium is gone, so no more lovenox shots!! We are loving that. We don't go back to the doctors until November provided she continues to do so well.