Thursday, May 29, 2008


I have always been fascinated with people and their personalities, perhaps that is why I studied behavioral sciences in college. Anyways I've been thinking a lot about how we are born with our personalities and our experiences in life either nurture those personalities or alter them in a way that perhaps causes a detriment to the individual. For example, children who have rather meek and mild personalities that are raised by overprotective parents--though I'm sure those parents mean the best, perhaps their efforts cause their children to not respond and grow as quickly as others would in similar situations.
I am realizing now even before Grace is born how different each child is even while in the womb. It is one of my big fears that I won't be able to cater my parenting style to each of my children to allow for their most optimal growth, so that they can succeed in all that they do and experience in life.

While I was pregnant with Morgan I was always afraid something was wrong with her because she didn't move as much as 'everyone' says a fetus should move. She was always up high in my ribs, even the day before she was born. At the time I didn't think much of it, but now I see how her personality was coming out even while in utero. She is a very calm and loving child. She always remains close to me or whoever is watching her. Whenever she cuddles she has to be stroking some part of your body. She is just very sweet and loving.

This pregnancy is quiet different--Grace is constantly moving and I'm carrying her quite low. For each of the ultrasounds and fetal echos we have had to have, she has never been in the best position for 'pictures' or for the doctors and technicians to view and see clearly what they need to. And if by chance she is in the right position--well look fast because it is almost like she is toying with you and will move without any notice.

Up until yesterday I didn't really have a clear opinion on what Grace's personality would be like-I've prayed that she would be feisty and that my fighter personality would get passed down to her...I am convinced it has. Yesterday we had another fetal echo, we were there with the technician and doctor for twice the amount of time than is usually expected; not because there was problems, but because of the total noncooperation of my daughter. First of all, she was again in a really difficult position to see anything clearly, so they had to take a round about method of getting the views they needed. Secondly, she would not stop moving, LITERALLY. For the whole hour and 45 minutes she moved and kicked and turned. When the technician finally got a good picture of the heart, within moments Grace folded her arms across her chest and wouldn't move them. Shortly after she brought her legs up and was in a little ball--almost as if to say, I know what you're doing and I'm not going to let it happen. So the technician literally stayed in the same spot for 20 minutes playing the waiting game..waiting to see if Grace would move. She didn't so the technician decided to take some pictures of the umbilical cord--hopefully tricking Grace enough so she would put her guard down. Well when the technician went back to check her heart, she couldn't find Grace for a moment, she was up in my rib cage sucking on her fingers!!! There came a point where the technician wanted me to try singing to her (I didn't) but I did start poking at her and she kicked back with such force that the technician couldn't help but laugh. I guess she has never seen a fetus do that before with such force and apparent intent.

So after that long recap--you can see why I'm convinced that my little Grace is and will be a fighter, it doesn't change things or how I feel about the road we will travel; but it does give me strength knowing that She will hopefully fight as hard as I would and am in my prayers.


Melanie said...

Personalities amaze me too. From birth it has been so fun to see the differences in my kids. They are so different. I hadn't thought much about in utero. Henry kept irritating my sciatic nerve. I hope that is not a sign that he will get on my nerves. He hasn't so far.

I loved hearing how you got to watch her move so much and know just what she is doing. I hope she learns some cooperation someday!

Rachel and Jared said...

Sounds like little Grace is a fighter! That is comforting. We are rooting you all on.


Oliver and Megan Hansen said...

Deanna, your fight is going to be an amazing help for both of your children and especially for Grace. I love that you have been able to see more of her personality already. I'm sure the thoughts & experiences you have had are positive things for her.