Monday, February 23, 2009

Pushed to breaking

I'm so stressed that I had a breakdown in the PICU--luckily we were in the back and not too many people were witnesses. Gracie has given me the biggest scare of my life, I thought for sure we were losing her. She is better now, not quite stable but hopefully getting there. She still will be critical until we find out what is going on.

Please pray, pray that she will fight. Pray that she won't give up. Pray that we will have months and years to hold, hug, smile, laugh and just be with my sweet sweet girl here on earth. Pray that we will know what is going on so we can better help her. Pray for those who are caring for her that they will be strong and strengthened spiritually and emotionally. Pray for Morgan that she will be ok without her mommy, daddy and Gracie for a bit. Pray that Heavenly Father won't take her away and that his wWill is to let her stay with us. Pray that these request will be reasonable request and Gracie's body and desire will be able to support them.

21 comments:

The Taylors said...

Oh I am so sorry, you are in my prayers. I also have everyone in my family praying for your guys. I have put your names in the Logan temple, hope you don't mind. Prayers coming your way.

The Taylors said...

Oh and it is okay to have breakdows. It is your baby and your life, don't worry about what people think! No one knows what is going on and how it feels.

Kristine said...

I'm so sorry that Gracie and your family have to go through any of this. Today sounds especially hard.

Lots of prayers being said for you here! :)

Is there anything you would like that would make anything a bit easier? For those of us who are far away it's hard to know how we can help.

aj said...

I'll pray for all that, and for you, too, Deanna. As a mother myself, I can't even begin to imagine the pain and desperation you feel right now.

Gracie has a VERY good mother!

The G Fam said...

Deanna and Jason,
We are there for you, 100%! Our hearts are aching for yours tonight, and I have called on every source I know tonight for prayers and strength! Gracie is so incredibly strong, and will fight! We will be strong for you.

Kaidence's Mommy said...

Don't worry, we will continue our prayers for you. As far as the breaking down, I used to do it as well and that is OK. One can only take so much stress and heartbreak before your own heart starts to crumble. Ask any of those nurse, I had plenty of those moments (I think that is really why they have curtains in the room).

Yep, That's Really Our Name! said...

Just found your blog through Gracey Anderson. I am so sorry..I can only imagine what you are going through. At 10 days old, my son with Tricuspid Atresia came very close to not making it. He is now a happy, energetic, 4-year old boy. Do whatever you need to do in order to get through this difficult time, even if it means breaking down in front of the entire PICU! The tiniest babies are the ones who make the biggest recoveries :) Heart Hugs, Gina

Hilary said...

OH my sweet Deanna, I am so sorry. Our prayers are most definatly with you. Please know I will be there in a moment if you need anything. Hold on!! Sending all our prayers and Faith, Ryan and Hilary Cook

Oliver and Megan said...

While we're praying for you, the only other thing i can even think to offer is some ice cream...need any? Let me know and I'll bring it to you.

Stacy said...

My heart is litterally aching for you. I found it hard to breathe when I read your blog. I don't know your wonderful family in person, but I do wish I could be there for you to provide some emotional support. Even if it is a shoulder to break down on. Please know, my family thinks of your BEAUTIFUL baby girl often. I can't get you off my mind. I just stare at her sweet smile. You guys are so amazing. Please, please know prayers are pouring out for you! Love, Stacy (mom to Corbin NICU/PICU mascot)

Aimee and Hardy said...

So many prayers coming your way. We are fasting with you this morning and pray that you will be strengthened and comforted, that Gracie will improve, and that the doctors adn nurses will be ablet o figure out what is going on an treat her properly. Stay strong!

The Richards Family said...

I have been following your blog for a couple of weeks now. I found your blog from another heart babies blog. My son Trig was born this past October with TGA. I just wanted to let you know that Little Gracie and your family are in our prayers. I am so sorry that Gracie and your family have to go through this but know that you will continue to be in many people thoughts and prayers. jamie

Kimberly said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers. Especially little Gracie! I will be praying for her medical team that they will know how to help her. Hang in there you guys!

Christina said...

Just wanted you to know we are still praying. I am sorry things are so hard right now. Please let us know if there is anything we can do for you!

Hugs & Prayers,
Christina
Jacob's Momma

Hilary said...

I am fasting today for you and your sweet Grace. I know that pray and fasting work. Love you

summer said...

We will pray and fast for both Gracies this day! Please know how much we care and understand the heartache!

As for the melt down....I have had plenty of those.....I think its good sometimes to let it all out!

Heavenly Father loves you and knows you! Hold on to that knowledge to get you through this tough time.

Fight Gracie fight!!!

Erica said...

praying, praying, praying

Anderson Family said...

Jason and Deanna,

We met you last night in the cafeteria - when you must have been posting this latest entry. We are so sorry that Gracie is having such a difficult time. Please know that we are praying, praying, praying for Gracie and all of your sweet family including Morgan. Tell Gracie to keep fighting - she is so strong!!

Alan and Kristi Anderson

carolyn q said...

Oh, you have every right to break down and I wish I could have been there to give you a hug. Please know that I am keeping watch for updates and praying very hard that things will get better and the doctors can figure out what is going on.
(Hugs)

carolyn q said...

Oh ya. . .one more thing when you are dealing with your sick kid in the PICU everything that is going on is agitating.
Don't feel to bad, one day I walked into the PICU and there stood my SIL at my daughter's bedside and the nurses were telling her all about what was going on. I was furious!!! I am not close to that SIL, she has always been a thorn in my side and I felt she was out of line to be there without notifying us that she was going to visit. I ended up having a YELLING match out in the hallway by the PICU doors with her that continued into the PICU waiting room. Social work was called and now looking back I feel so bad about what occured, but I was stressed to the limit and I wanted to be the one that was told information on my daughter not her. Good thing there is now a better rule with the HIPPA. Still don't care much for my SIL though!
So it could be worse for you :0)

aj said...

I hope both you and Gracie had a better day today!! :)

Still praying!